about judgment from others, i have found that in general i don't care. and if i care, it's because i care about that person enough not to take his or her judgment as something negative but as an honest and well-intentioned opinion i can learn from (even if i do not agree)

Ask what would you do if you were in their place. Then do it, or if you are able, suggest them doing it. Also, try to understand where people are coming from. People very hardly act by mere spontaneity, there is always a reason (be it unconscious, involuntary or even from past lives) behind every choice...

It all comes down to walking on their moccasins.

"How can we transform our own judgemental tendencies?"

Remember that we can only judge ourselves. We can't know the intracacies of anybody else's path, so judging them means comparing them to ourselves and what we've experienced. Unless they're us, it's invalid to do that. In fact, most of the time judging yourself is truly invalid. There's almost nothing in this world that's inherently good or bad, right or wrong, things just are. Therefore, judgement is artificial and imposed by us on things that don't deserve it.

"How can we transform what we perceive to be judgement from others?

One of my teachers asked this question: "When is an insult not an insult?" The answer: "When you refuse to take it that way." We cannot transform the judgement of others, that would imply that we either have some control over them, or that they are victimizing us through their judgement. All we can control is ourselves. Don't buy into other people's judgement, it's their issue, not yours. Don't worry about the intent of others, focus on your own.

All that being said, "When is an insult not an insult?" is pretty much a daily mantra for me. Judging others and myself comes so 'naturally', it's hard to break the cycle. I've heard that judgement is an ego structure, and it serves to protect us from things that are different or otherwise scary. Just as with other ego structures, when I identify that I'm judging others, I thank my ego for participating, assure it that it no longer needs to protect me in that way and attempt to let it go. The letting go part has always been most difficult for me. Not impossible, just difficult.

But then again, I'm Pleased to be a Poophead. :)

I think judgment is a way to reinforce ourselves by putting others down.

When I feel insecure I compare myself to others only to elevate myself fragile ego.

When I'm balanced I don't need to condemn the way others think. I can accept the opinions and beliefs of others when I'm grounded and solid with myself.

I was lucky to learn some decent lesson on being less judgemental back in High School..I was a peer group leader in my last year of high school...and we got exposed to some truly wonderful life lessons in that experience...granted as I said I do sometimes find myself beign judgemental, and it usually and only happens when I'm not in a good space with myself or my life. I find it to be a way to compensation for things I might be lacking in myself.